When you say this:
"I’ve definitely had some awful ideas about what I could do to leave a permanent impact.
And it’s a bad thing to do.
Because I’ve also been thinking: The death of a family is a tragic thing."
Are you saying you are thinking about killing your family?
No, I was rather thinking of making a sense.
Like saying horrible things or breaking stuff apart.
Because a mindset I had was "make them aware", guess I wanted attention.
Because my family also gets in dramas and arguments, even without my presense/input.
So the mindset was "push some buttons hard enough to see if there's real change".
Yesterday, I made use of a pass I bought to travel by bus, so I can get some independence.
Between this and finding some work, I can do more to improve myself instead of burning bridges and doing stupid shit.
MarkerSlayer
It's a rough time but step by step we're gonna make it